Afford Anything

Category: Lifestyle

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#606: Can You Really Afford to Die? – with Hospice and Oncology Nurse Suzanne O’Brien

Hospice nurse and end-of-life educator Suzanne O’Brien joins us to discuss the financial realities of dying in America — and they might surprise you.

Remember Aretha Franklin?

Her handwritten will was found in her couch cushions after she passed away. Despite her substantial wealth, this simple document was legally upheld. It’s a powerful reminder that having any form of will is better than none at all.

But there’s more to worry about than just having a will or trust. The costs of aging and dying can add up fast.

Long-term care costs can quickly deplete even substantial savings. Suzanne shares a story about a couple with over $5 million who were shocked to learn how quickly 24/7 care for dementia would consume their nest egg.

Traditional funerals average between $7,000-$11,000, but there are much more affordable alternatives:

• Home wakes and natural burials can cost just a few hundred dollars
• Water cremation offers an environmentally friendly option
• Whole body donation to medical institutions costs nothing while contributing to education

Planning ahead gives you control over these decisions and spares your loved ones additional stress. Multi-generational living arrangements can also reduce caregiving costs and address concerns like isolation and safety for aging family members.

Suzanne also shares stories about the emotional side of dying. Did you know some people seem to choose when they go? She tells us about a 99-year-old woman in a coma who somehow held on for days until she turned 100, then passed away that very night.

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#596: First Friday: Tariffs Grab Headlines, But These Financial Changes Nobody Is Talking About Will Impact You Too

Yesterday, the White House rolled out the biggest tariffs in a century, sending markets into their worst decline since the pandemic. While headlines focus on supply chains and inflation, there are important economic stories you’re not hearing about.
During the first half of this month’s First Friday episode, we dig into what nobody’s talking about. And in the second half, we grapple with the headlines.
Student loan rules just changed again. The government added new limits to Public Service Loan Forgiveness. Right now, 9.2 million people — one in five borrowers — can’t keep up with payments. Many folks don’t even know payments started again after that four-and-a-half-year break.
S&P just dropped a new report that backs what smart money already knows: index funds crush actively managed funds 90 percent of the time. Even with all those tech stocks dominating the market, you still come out ahead with simple indexing.
You know who’s gobbling up the mortgage market? Rocket Companies. They just bought both Redfin and Mr. Cooper. They’ll handle one of every six mortgages in America. They’ve positioned themselves at every step of the homebuying journey — from when you search for homes on Redfin to financing and monthly payments for the next 30 years.
The White House just made a surprising move with Bitcoin. They’re setting up a Strategic Bitcoin Reserve to hold coins long-term. They’re also creating a separate stockpile for crypto they seize in legal cases. Pretty clear signal that Bitcoin stands apart from other cryptocurrencies.
In the second half, we dive into those significant new tariffs making headlines.
The S&P 500 dropped 4.8 percent on Thursday — we haven’t seen a drop like that since the pandemic. The new rules put at least a 10 percent tariff on everything coming into the country. Then come the “reciprocal” rates: 20 percent for European goods, 27 percent for items from India, and a combined 65 percent for Chinese imports.
We bring in Bob Elliott to make sense of this situation. His credentials are impressive — he spent 13 years at Bridgewater Associates (the world’s largest hedge fund), served as head of Ray Dalio’s investment team, and graduated magna cum laude from Harvard.
During the 2008 crisis, he directly advised the Treasury, Federal Reserve, and White House.
Bob offers a reality check about bringing back manufacturing jobs: you can’t build factories overnight. These investments take years, and companies hesitate to make 30-year commitments when policies change every few months.
Bob breaks down four economic forces all hitting at once: tariffs jacking up prices, government cutting spending, tax policies on hold, and the Fed moving like molasses. Put them together? Yikes. He doesn’t sugarcoat it — the short-term outlook looks “pretty negative.”

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#591: Harvard Negotiation Expert: Why Conflict Avoidance Costs You More Than You Think

Imagine you’re about to ask your boss for a raise. Your stomach tightens. You’ve rehearsed what to say, but doubt creeps in. Should you be more assertive? More understanding of company constraints?

Bob Bordone, who has taught negotiation for 25 years including 21 years at Harvard Law School, joins us to explain why you don’t have to choose between empathy and assertiveness. In fact, combining them is key to successful negotiations.

“It might feel like a tension, but it’s not an actual one,” Bordone explains. “I can fully appreciate what you’re feeling without ever giving anything up in a negotiation.”

Bordone breaks down his three-part preparation framework:
1. Mirror work: Identify the different sides of yourself in a negotiation — the empathic side that understands company constraints, the assertive side that knows you deserve recognition, and perhaps an anxious side worried about finances.
2. Chair work: Give each side a voice through role-playing exercises, literally sitting in different chairs to embody each perspective.
3. Table work: Bring these voices into the actual negotiation in an authentic way that doesn’t make the other person feel attacked.

He also introduces fascinating concepts like “conflict recognition” — how quickly we perceive something as a conflict — and “conflict holding” — our comfort with leaving conflicts unresolved. These differences often cause relationship problems when we’re unaware of them.

“My best friend and I might debate over Flaming Hot Cheetos for 25 minutes. For me, with high conflict recognition, it’s completely fun. I go home and sleep like a baby,” Bordone says. “For someone with low conflict recognition, they might think, ‘That was horrible. Did I hurt the relationship?'”

When someone tries to shut down your request with policy (“that’s just how we do things here”), Bordone recommends what he calls the “Wizard of Oz tactic” — asking a few more questions rather than immediately accepting defeat.

The skills you develop asking for a raise transfer to other challenging conversations — from family inheritance discussions to political disagreements with colleagues.

Bordone emphasizes that conflict isn’t something to avoid but rather a normal part of relationships. The question isn’t whether we’ll have conflict, but how we handle it when it inevitably arrives.

Want to hear the full conversation? Listen to the latest episode wherever you get your podcasts.

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#572: Your Last Thoughts Won’t Be About Money, with Dr. Jordan Grumet

At age 7, Dr. Jordan Grumet lost his father. This early loss shaped his career path — he became a physician, following in his dad’s footsteps. But by 2010, feeling burned out from internal medicine, he took an unexpected turn: he became a hospice doctor.

In this episode, Dr. Grumet joins us to discuss what he’s learned from thousands of conversations with people in their final days.

These discussions have revealed a pattern: people don’t typically regret their bank balance on their deathbed. Instead, they regret not pursuing the activities and dreams that truly lit them up.

Dr. Grumet explains the difference between what he calls “Big P Purpose” versus “little p purpose.” Big P Purpose involves major life goals like becoming president or curing cancer. Little p purpose, by contrast, focuses on the process — finding activities you enjoy regardless of the outcome.

He shares the story of a young professional who loved competitive cycling. While working a demanding nonprofit job, this person started fixing bikes at races on weekends. This side project combined his skills and passion, eventually creating enough income for him to reduce his full-time hours.

Dr. Grumet introduces three key concepts for building more purpose into your life:

– Joy of Addition: Add activities that excite you, even if just for 15 minutes daily
– Art of Subtraction: Remove activities that drain you
– Substitution: When you can’t add or subtract, swap one activity for another

He emphasizes that money isn’t the only tool for creating change. Youth, energy, relationships, skills and community can be equally valuable resources. A 22-year-old might lack funds but has the advantage of time and stamina that a 51-year-old doesn’t possess.

Dr. Grumet references the Harvard Adult Developmental Health Study, which found that strong relationships — not achievements or money — most strongly correlate with happiness. He suggests that pursuing activities you enjoy naturally leads to building these vital connections.

The episode closes with a powerful story about his grandfather, who loved math and became an accountant in the 1950s.

This passion influenced Dr. Grumet’s mother to become a CPA, which in turn helped young Jordan develop confidence in math, despite his reading challenges. Years later, this mathematical thinking helped him diagnose a rabbi’s rare condition — proving how small actions can create ripple effects across generations.

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#552: The Harsh Truth About Getting Wealthy

Dr. Brad Klontz and Adrian Brambila join us for part two of their three-part series on “harsh truths” about building wealth.

The first truth sets the tone: being poor sucks. But they quickly distinguish between being “broke” (having no money, which can be temporary) and having a “poor mindset” (which keeps people stuck).

Even high-income earners can have a poor mindset, they explain, sharing examples of pro athletes and celebrities who earned millions but lost it all.

The discussion moves to whether the financial system is “rigged.” While acknowledging real systemic challenges, they argue that viewing it as a rigged system leads to powerlessness. Instead, they suggest viewing wealth-building as a game with specific rules to learn and master.

Several guests share candid stories about their own financial journeys. Brambila describes living in a van while earning seven figures, challenging assumptions about what wealth looks like.

Klontz reveals how he lost money day trading during the tech bubble, using that experience to warn against get-rich-quick schemes.

The conversation tackles touchy subjects like distancing yourself from friends with poor money mindsets. Klontz shares how he had to end a friendship with his best man when their different approaches to business created tension. They emphasize this isn’t about income levels – it’s about mindset and habits.

Through personal examples, they explore why people often undervalue their work. Brambila describes initially pricing his online courses too low due to imposter syndrome. They discuss how both employees and entrepreneurs need to understand their true market value.

The duo challenges common beliefs about jobs, arguing that “only liars love their jobs” since most people would change how they work if they had financial freedom. They use the example of petting puppies – even a dream job becomes less appealing when you lose control over your time.

On lottery tickets, they expand beyond just criticizing gambling to examine how get-rich-quick mindsets distract from real wealth-building strategies. Klontz shares research showing 97% of day traders lose money, using this to illustrate why seemingly easy paths to wealth usually fail.

Throughout the episode, the guests weave together psychology, practical advice, and frank discussion of uncomfortable truths about money. While some of their statements spark controversy, they back up their positions with research and real-world examples from their own lives and their work with clients.

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#542: Are We All Financial Hypochondriacs? Why We Feel Broke, Even When Our Bank Accounts Are Full

Ever feel like you’re never doing enough with your money, even when your finances look good on paper? 

You’re not alone. 

Katie Gatti Tassin, host of the Money with Katie podcast, dives into a phenomenon called “money dysmorphia” in today’s interview.

She shares how she got flooded with responses when she asked her listeners about money dysmorphia. Folks with hefty savings and investments still worry they’re not doing enough. It’s like they’re always waiting for the other shoe to drop.

Where does this come from? Katie points to a few culprits. Social media is an obvious scapegoat. But traditional media plays a role too. Think about all those TV shows where “normal” families live in massive houses and drive fancy cars. It skews our perception of what’s average.

Location matters too. Katie talks about how moving from Dallas to Fort Collins changed her spending habits. Different cities have different vibes and social norms around money.

The conversation takes an interesting turn when Katie shares her own experience buying a Porsche. She felt conflicted, worried her FIRE (Financial Independence, Retire Early) community would judge her. It highlights how even personal finance experts grapple with these issues.

They also touch on how the pandemic shook up financial priorities. When faced with uncertainty, some people realized saving for a far-off future might not be the only goal worth pursuing.

Katie and Paula discuss the importance of balance. It’s good to save, but not at the expense of living your life now. They suggest seeking out voices in the personal finance world to get a more rounded perspective.

Travel comes up as a way to gain financial perspective. Seeing how people live in other parts of the world can make you appreciate what you have or show you where your own country could improve.

Katie and Paula offer food for thought on how to navigate our complex relationship with money. It’s a conversation that might make you think differently about your own financial mindset.

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#537: Ask Paula: “I Ran Out of Gas with 85 Cents in My Bank Account”

Frequent contributor Joe Saul-Sehy shares an emotional, personal story of getting into a soul-crushing level of debt in his 20s and early 30s.

He owed so much in back taxes to the IRS that he didn’t file a tax return for three years.

He ran out of gas and was stranded on the side of the highway, with 85 cents remaining in his bank account.

By the time he pulled himself out of debt, his twin son and daughter were seven years old.

Learn the gripping, gut-wrenching story of Joe’s past money mistakes in today’s episode.

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#528: The Stock Market is in Panic Mode and the Unemployment Rate Jumped – But Everything’s Fine

The Federal Reserve recently decided to hold interest rates steady, leading to significant shifts in the stock market. The Dow dropped over 850 points, and the NASDAQ entered correction territory, falling more than 10% from its peak.

But what do these numbers mean for you? We break down the latest jobs report, which shows a rise in unemployment to 4.3%, triggering a recession indicator known as the Sahm Rule. This isn’t just economic jargon; it affects real lives, impacting job security, investments, and financial planning.

We discuss potential ripple effects on various sectors, such as real estate, where interest rates influence housing affordability.

We also examine the technology sector’s volatility and how recent market corrections might influence tech stocks and the overall investment landscape.

Understanding this can help you make informed decisions about your investment portfolio.

Every First Friday of the month, we bring you our “First Friday Monthly Economic Report,” where we help you make sense of these trends.

We aim to make complex economic concepts accessible. Join us as we explore these pressing economic issues.

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Afford Anything