It’s an old familiar hum:
Every January, we kickoff the calendar year with New Years Resolutions: lose 10 pounds, make smarter investments, create an extra $1,500 per month on the side.
Yet by February, we’ve returned to life as usual. The discarded New Years Resolution has become a tired cultural trope.
We blame ourselves for these failures:
- “I should work harder.”
- “I should be more disciplined.”
- “I should stop procrastinating.”
But what if we’re approaching this in the wrong way? What if goal-setting itself is the problem?
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Society says goal-setting is as integral to life as food, sleep, and arguing with your GPS.
“Dammit, Siri, I can’t turn left! That’s a one-way street!”
I’ve set countless goals over the years; I’ve achieved some, fallen short at others, and exceeded a few. Yet I’ve also lived with constant, low-level anxiety about my ability to meet my own expectations.
Lately, as a thought experiment, I’ve started wondering what would happen if I gave up the practice of setting goals.
Would I transform into a couch-and-potato-chips sloth, watching cartoons all afternoon? (Actually, that sounds kinda nice.) Or would I relax, and, paradoxically, accomplish more as a result?
I don’t have all the answers, but I’d like to explore these questions. So today, let’s examine the downside of setting goals. We’ll define a “goal” as a specific future outcome (result) that a person or group tries to create.
Problem #1: Goals harm intrinsic motivation.
Imagine your goal is to lose 10 pounds. You exercise daily, but you don’t enjoy your time at the gym. You grudgingly endure your workouts, while fantasizing about results.
What are the chances that you’ll (#1) reach your goal, and (#2) maintain a lifelong exercise habit?
Not likely.
But why?
To answer this, let’s look at two types of motivation: intrinsic and extrinsic.
- Intrinsic motivation is driven by enjoying the activity itself.
- Extrinsic motivation is driven by an outcome.
If you read books, play guitar, or hike for its own sake — with no expectation of reward — you’re intrinsically motivated.
But if you read books to appear smarter, play guitar to make money or attract dates, or hike to build muscle, you’re extrinsically motivated.
Intrinsic motivation is more effective, research shows. Given the choice between rewards vs. enjoyment, you’re more likely to do stuff you love. For example, students who enjoy learning for its own sake — who are driven by curiosity and challenge — are more likely to remain life-long learners than students who are merely motivated to get a high G.P.A.
Most of us structure our lives and businesses around getting results — “I want to make $500 per month on the side.”
But we’re happier and more productive when we focus on enjoying the activity itself — “I love the challenge of growing a small business.”
Let’s return to our earlier example: your weight-loss goal and subsequent grudging-trips-to-the-gym.
Research shows (and workout enthusiasts know) that exercise is brimming with inherent benefits: lower stress, higher endorphins, better sleep. But if you’re preoccupied with the scale, you might overlook these intrinsic benefits. You’ve re-framed exercise as a means to an end, a delivery vehicle for results, rather than as an activity meant to be enjoyed for its own sake.
You’ve approached it with a results-based mindset (“what can I get from this?”), rather than an intrinsically-motivated mindset (“do I enjoy this?”) And ironically, you’re less likely to achieve and maintain results in the long-term.
The problem gets worse when we start tying “unnatural” rewards to an activity — like rewarding a trip to the gym with an indulgent hour of television.
Bestselling author Gretchen Rubin, in her book Better Than Before, uses this example:
“If I tell [my daughter] that she can watch an hour of TV if she reads for an hour, I don’t build her habit of reading; I teach her that watching TV is more fun than reading.”
Tying an action to a reward is counterproductive.
Rubin, a guest on my podcast, pointed out another problem: goals and rewards create a “finish line.” This undermines the activity by framing it as temporary; it defines a stopping point. Sure, you’ll train for a marathon, but will you continue running once it’s over?
Problem #2: Goals can make you miss the bigger picture.
In the 1960’s, Ford Motor Company noticed that small, inexpensive vehicles had begun booming in popularity.
They wanted to get on the bandwagon. (Is that a pun?)
So the company’s CEO declared an ambitious goal: by 1970, Ford would produce a vehicle that’s “under 2,000 pounds and under $2,000.” (That’s $12,559 in today’s dollars.)
Ford’s engineers and designers threw themselves into this project, and by September 1970, the company started production on its latest innovation: the Ford Pinto.
There was just one tiny problem.
The goal “under 2,000 pounds and under $2,000” was too specific; it didn’t address critical issues like quality or safety. The company’s management, distracted by their narrow goal, overlooked a serious design flaw related to the positioning of the fuel tank: the Pinto could ignite upon impact.
At least 53 people died in Ford Pinto fires, and in 1977, the Pinto became the largest product recall at that point in history.
When Ford’s management focused on a goal that was too narrow and specific, they blinded themselves to the bigger picture.
Conventional wisdom says that goals ought to be S.M.A.R.T. — specific, measurable, attainable, relevant and time-bound. For example:
- “I want to earn $10,000 per month by July.”
- “I want my business revenue to grow 15 percent by December.”
- “I want six-pack washboard abs by August.”
“Under 2,000 pounds and under $2,000 by 1970” is a textbook S.M.A.R.T. goal — and on the surface, the team succeeded in reaching this goal.
But this implicitly relegated other qualities, like safety, to — um — the backburner. (Oohhh, no pun intended.)
(Ouch, that’s terrible.)
The Ford Pinto case study, while an extreme example, is a cautionary tale: when we set specific goals, we narrow our attention — and therefore we risk overlooking something important.
“Goals focus attention … This intense focus can blind people to important issues that appear unrelated to their goal,” wrote a team of researchers in a Harvard working paper, Goals Gone Wild. (Yes, that’s actually what they called the paper. Legit.)
“… Consistent with the classic notion that you get what you reward, goal-setting may cause people to ignore important dimensions of performance …,” they wrote.
It’s easy for people (not just companies) to make the same mistake.
When we commit to tight, specific goals — “I’m going to save $1,000 this month!” — we risk creating unintended consequences in other arenas.
For example, have you ever skimped on your health — e.g. eating cheap food like Ramen noodles, or skipping doctor’s visits, or not filling a prescription — for the sake of hitting your savings goal?
Have you ever let friendships, sleep and exercise slide because you’re too focused on a work or business goal?
Yeah, me too.
“What gets measured, gets done,” is a famous quote in management circles, but let’s remember its corollary: what doesn’t get measured gets overlooked.
Problem #3: Fear interferes.
I’ve been trying to write this article for two months.
But procrastination keeps getting in the way. I tell myself that I need to check email. Update Facebook. Buy cotton Q-tips on Amazon.
Then I catch myself. I disconnect from wi-fi; I open my writing program. And … I suddenly need a snack.
At this rate, I’ll speak fluent Portuguese and hold a pilot’s license before I finish this damn article.
If I’m honest with myself, I’m procrastinating because I’m afraid of the outcome.
- What if nobody reads this article?
- What if people read it … but hate it?
- What if I’m a sucky writer?
Procrastination is rooted in fear: fear of failure, fear of success, fear of change. These are rooted in developing an attachment to a specific outcome — another word for “goal.”
As Ray Williams writes in Psychology Today:
“One inherent problem with goal-setting is related to how the brain works. Recent neuroscience research shows the brain works in a protective way, resistant to change. Therefore, any goals that require substantial behavioral change, or thinking-pattern change, will automatically be resisted.
“The brain is wired to seek rewards and avoid pain or discomfort, including fear. When fear of failure creeps into the mind of the goal setter, it becomes a ‘demotivator,’ with a desire to return to known, comfortable behavior and thought patterns.”
Goals trigger fear, and fear gets in the way of the work.
Fear interferes.
In this example:
- I created a goal: write a smart, funny article that my audience will love.
- I developed fear around any other possible alternative. (What if this article is not smart/funny/loved?)
- Fear manifests as procrastination …
- … and this article lives in ‘draft’ mode for two months.
Alternatively, what if I’d told myself:
- I’ll enjoy reading and writing about a fascinating topic.
- Then I’ll share that writing with the world.
If I gave up goal-setting, fear would become irrelevant.
Problem #4: Goals make you dissatisfied with the present moment.
One final objection: Goals are built on the premise that now isn’t good enough.
You’ll be happy later — after you start earning more, after you quit your job, after you can live on your passive investment income.
Goals fixate on the future. If you’re too goal-oriented, you risk missing the present moment; you live for the next milestone.
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Again, I’m just exploring this idea. I’m not a card-carrying member of the Anti-Goal League; I’m not making definitive statements. But I’m intrigued enough by the idea of a goal-free existence that I decided to dedicate an article to exploring it.
We’ve outlined the objections above. Now what? Where do we go from here? If goals are flawed, what’s the better alternative? I scoured the Internet and found three options:
Alternative #1: Abstinence
You could avoid goals entirely.
That’s the approach Zen Habits author Leo Babauta embraced, when he declared — (mostly) unambiguously — “I live mostly without goals.”
Here’s how he describes goal-free living:
“What do you do, then? Lay around on the couch all day, sleeping and watching TV and eating Ho-Hos? No, you simply do. You find something you’re passionate about, and do it.”
He says he plunges into activities — such as writing and teaching — without any specific goal in mind. He doesn’t have ‘sales goals’ for his books; he just writes.
Hmmm. I like that. But …
My self-identify as a Type A entrepreneur is kicking up serious resistance. I’m not ready for a goal-free existence. It’s too extreme of a leap — like a steak-and-seafood enthusiast suddenly turning vegan.
What else is on the menu?
Alternative #2: Moderation
On one hand, goals can narrow our focus, dampen our intrinsic motivation, and diminish our enjoyment of the present moment.
On the other hand, goals can inspire, motivate and improve our lives.
Maybe, then, we don’t need to eradicate goals. We need to create better goals.
“Just as doctors prescribe drugs selectively, mindful of interactions and adverse reactions, so too should managers carefully prescribe goals,” wrote the researchers in Goals Gone Wild.
Okay, great. But how?
Alternative #3: Re-Direction
This is the best answer I’ve discovered so far —
Focus on actions, not results.
Instead of: “My goal is to lose 10 pounds.”
Try: “My goal is to exercise daily, cut back on sugar and alcohol, and eat more veggies.”
It’s a subtle difference, but in the latter example, you’re not trying to achieve any results.
If some natural consequence (like weight loss) stems from your actions, that’s fine — but that’s not the point.
You have no expectations, no self-imposed barometers. You’re only thinking about your actions. The results are outside of your control. You won’t be disappointed if a specific result doesn’t unfold; you won’t cross a ‘finish line’ if it does.
Here’s why this is brilliant:
Circle of Concern vs. Circle of Influence
Here’s a circle.
Everything you care about lives inside this circle — nuclear war, terrorism, sustainability, animal rights, the greying of your hair, your minor back pain, those scratches on your car, your investments, your income, augmented reality, colonizing Mars, whether or not artificial intelligence will kill us, and whether or not your socks match.
It’s quite a circle.
Stephen Covey, who introduced this concept in 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, calls this your “Circle of Concern.” Wallowing within your Circle of Concern creates blockage, resistance, fear. You can’t control these outcomes, so worrying is ineffective.
Inside of this, however, lives a smaller circle.
This circle only holds the concerns you can directly affect. This is your Circle of Influence.
You don’t hold much power or influence over Mars colonization and the future of artificial intelligence. You are, however, the CEO and Chairperson over your investment choices, your focus and effort at developing new skills, your hair color, and weather or not your socks match.
If you operate within your Circle of Influence, you’ll make the biggest impact. And the more you operate inside of this circle, the larger this circle grows over time.
How does this relate to goal-setting? Simply stated:
You cannot control results.
- I can create an online course, but I can’t control whether or not people are interested.
- I can create a podcast, but I can’t control whether or not people will listen.
- I can be kind to others, but I can’t control whether or not people will like me.
Results are outside of your Circle of Influence. But actions are inside of your circle.
- I can create an amazing course. (Actions: outline, research, edit, edit, edit, tear up, re-write, edit.)
- I can prepare for the podcast. (Actions: research guests, prepare for interviews, etc.)
- I can be kind to others. (Actions: for starters, just don’t be a dick.)
I can’t control the consequences. All I can do is act.
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This brings us back to the original question: How can we apply this framework towards setting better goals?
Here are a few examples:
Instead of: “My goal is to retire in 10 years.”
Try: “My goal is to invest at least 50 percent of my income into index funds and rental properties.”
Instead of: “My goal is to earn $X this year.”
Try: “My goal is to identify three things that I’m doing that are a waste of time. Then I’d like to redirect this time to something more valuable.”
Instead of: “My goal is to learn basic Spanish.”
Try: “My goal is to use a Spanish language-learning app for at least 20 minutes a day.”
Instead of: “My goal is to write a book.”
Try: “My goal is to read and write from 9 am to 11 am.”
This is a low-stress approach. You cannot fear failure, because you’ve surrendered the results. Your only goal is to act.
As fear subsides, you’re more likely to quit procrastinating. You won’t distract yourself as much with email, Facebook, and buying Q-tips on Amazon.
But you’ll still argue with your GPS.
Some things never change.
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I’ve been focusing on increasing my goal-setting and goal-reviewing habits in light of suggestions from your, Gretchen Rubin’s, and John Lee Dumas’s podcasts and resources. This article helps put goal-setting back into perspective. I’m better at intrinsic motivation than extrinsic, so maybe I should be too rigid in setting goals and focus on the process.
I love this Paula!
I’ve never been much of a goal setter myself, and I’m happy to see a different perspective.
Like you pointed out, I get so focused on achieving specific results that it scares the crap out of me. I’m scared that I’ll fail, scared of what people will think, scared that I’ll put so much work into something & people will hate it.
I have fallen into the goal setting mantra BS with everyone else lately though…it’s what we are supposed to do, right?!?! I’ve found I do much better when I decide to do something & just plow through.
Thanks for this, might just be the kick in the ass I needed to actually get shit done (like my next blog post that I’ve been procrastinating on)
Definitely a very unique perspective of plowing through versus slow and steady, loved it! I’ve been working on a sex and money blog, specifically aimed at young professionals. And, I focus a lot of attention towards goal setting and achievable actions steps! Like your blog, my blog goal is to inform readers but more importantly keep them entertained enough to keep reading!
Wow can’t wait for your blog to get started. Money and sex together?? POW!! Lol
Paula, as usual a brilliant article.
I have been procrastinating a lot about a project that I am working on. I am so focused on goals, I have forgotten that I enjoy the process of building.
Thanks
Goals Gone Wild … love it!
I try to set my goals around process, but I still consider them goals in my mind. I guess in your final example you would still consider them goals right? So not a goal free existence, just process / action goals rather than SMART?
Setting my goals for process / actions, I like think about a meta goal of discipline. I don’t care enough about 6 pack abs to stick to the action of exercise every morning. But add the fact that I will learn discipline that will make every other goal easier… awesome!
@Brian — Yep, exactly. The “re-direction” isn’t abstaining from goals, but instead, redirecting those goals so that they’re targeted inside your Circle of Influence — i.e., focusing on actions/process instead of results. Because ultimately, the actions/process are the only thing we can really control! 🙂
Thanks for another great article! i always enjoy these and love your writing style.
I should have come up with a better example considering I don’t have 6 pack abs!
Have you read about Carol Dweck’s growth mindset stuff? She has come out recently and said people have been doing it wrong, they are putting in the practice, but aren’t deliberate about it. They are going through the motions, so even though putting in the time, aren’t getting results.
I’ve read some of Carol Dweck’s ideas about fixed mindsets vs. growth mindsets, but I haven’t followed her in awhile.
Her warning about deliberate practice sounds spot-on … many people think that putting in their 10,000 hours is sufficient, when in fact, the hours alone won’t lead to improvement. Those hours need to be focused, deliberate, and subject to feedback and coaching and iterating. The books So Good They Can’t Ignore You, by Cal Newport, and Talent is Overrated, by Geoff Colvin, both talk about the idea of deliberate practice.
Yep, sometimes goals could be too narrowly focused, to the potential detriment of the big picture. I also like your motto of focusing on building out systems, rather than focusing merely on goals for goals sake.
For example, if I can save $10,000 in 2017, I can expect to generate $300 in estimated future annual dividend income for life. I can set a goal of generating $300 in annual income, which will be easy to hit if I save $833/month.
However, if I put that money in my 401 (k) instead, I would be “stuck” buying an S&P 500 fund that yields 2%. So on first reading, I will miss my goal by doing that. However, the reader may be missing out that I will be reaping tax savings on the contributions, and I will also defer paying taxes on those dividends and cap gains. If we assume I am in the 25% tax bracket, this exercise will allow me to save $2,500 on taxes, which I can then either put back in the 401 (k). But the issue would be that I am failing my goal since this investment won’t generate $300 in annual dividend income.
Once I am in a position to convert the 401 (k) to an IRA, I can get my own dividend stocks and get a higher level of income overall for my future self.
So while option 2 would fail me towards my goals, it would allow me to reach my ultimate objectives much faster.
Myopic focusing on goals for goals sake could be detrimental to the overall financial situation.
Thanks for sharing the details of that. Good luck to you on your finance goals. Very admirable
Dear Paula,
Thank you for this! Great ways of talking about motivation- love it!
I recently came up against this with a goal that didn’t suit me and I ended up not doing it. (What’s worse is I now own 4,009 q tips and felt guilty to boot!) thank you for reframing this for me and making us all a bit more conscious of our inorganic, type-A way of life. Best wishes to you!
4,009 Q-tips? That sounds like an interesting story ….
Yes, yes yes yes!!! All of this! Such an enlightening and liberating read. Thankyou Paula, so very much!!!
This really hit home. Your way of re-framing much of what I already love (Covey’s Circle, breaking down goals into actions) was just what I needed this week. Thank you, Paula!
Thank you for posting this. it totally explains my personal method of picking a motto for the year and taking goals as a like things to get done this week list instead of yearly resolutions.
This was a great article. Really made me think. I’ve been mostly goal-less since FIRE on 5OCT2012. I just sort of stumbled into that but it is a pretty lazy approach to life. I need to do better.
Count me as someone who sets goals more in moderation, though in my sphere of influence. IE it has to be something I can directly control and the day to day goals are things like tomorrow I will write one post. There are bigger goals but its important to see both the forest and the trees.
“When Ford’s management focused on a goal that was too narrow and specific, they blinded themselves to the bigger picture.”
Wow, what an eye opener to the purpose of setting appropriate goals. My brain’s in overdrive, and I thank you for making me think.
Great article! I have always tried to do SMART goals, but most of them fail miserably. I never understood why. I just assumed that I wasn’t disciplined enough. You’re explanation of extrinsic motivation was perfect. It makes so much sense why I failed at past goals.
I also love how you challenge the entire notion of goals. You always find alternative viewpoints and make well thought out arguments for them. I look forward to seeing how your views will evolve on goals.
In the meantime I need to rewrite some of my current goals.
Just wow!!!!! Thank you for this! I seriously needed this!
Great article, Paula. This reader loved it!
I’ve recently set action focused goals for nutrition and exercise. Worked well, lost 18 lbs since October as a side effect.
Never put that together as a lesson applicable to other areas of my life. But your examples broke that mental barrier for me. And now maybe I will finally move forward with two activities that have been stalled by fear. Ok, three.
Thank you Paula. Thank you tremendously!
Very interesting, I think I set my goals more in moderation unless I’m really serious about them, then I would set some extreme goals and force it. I will probably burn out if I went that extreme though.
I think being flexible with your goals and adjusting it every now and then are great and would help keep goals in check.
I’m looking at my SMART based New Year’s resolutions list as I type this! It’s true that all the goals that I’ve ‘succeeded’ on, the focus was on the actions not the goal itself. Basically I ‘succeeded’ at the goal because the actions became positive habits resulting in the desired outcome. For example regularly exercising has kept my weight in check. So I totally agree with your thinking on goals in this domain.
Where I think goals do have a place is on projects that have a specific completion point. For example, my goal in January was to finish a quilt for my sister that I’ve been putting off for 10 years (ouch). It’s done, I feel awesome and I never want to sew another quilt in my life. In this instance I found the SMART framework was useful because it made me act to get the job done.
Ha ha! Looks like I’m confusing goals with projects – https://michaelhyatt.com/goal-vs-project.html
This article is inspiring me to look at my current goals and re-work them. Your tips will help me stay motivated by not focusing on the end result, but the joy of the work. Thank you for this! I’m glad you stopped procrastinating on this one!
Great article Paula, thank you! I agreed with your last method for goals. I’ve been hearing and reading about that philosophy within the past couple months. It’s extremely helpful when you really wrap your head around it. (It was difficult for me and took a while to really “connect the dots”) it’s all about the actionable items you can control! They are within your realm. Love it 🙂 You’re always providing value and I’ve been waiting for an automated email for a while! 😛 so thanks!
Totally. Worth. The. Wait.
Carry on.
Oh, my goodness!!!
Another post that hits the nail on the head, Paula. How many times have I told my friends, colleagues, doctor, dietitian, and so on that my goal is not to lose a certain amount or percentage of weight, but to lead a healthier life that includes exercise and healthier food and beverage choices? It’s not a “diet”; it’s a lifestyle, routine, or, in Hebrew, a “framework”.
How many times have I tried to explain to those same people that living my lifestyle is not a means to an end (early retirement/financial independence), it is the end in and of itself?
The circle of concern and influence? Oh, man. Not the first time I read or heard about it. In fact, I’ve been living it even before someone ever spelled it out for me. I believe the facilitator of a work-related course on how to achieve better results mentioned it. In any case, words I have lived and continue to live by!
Now, if only I could convince my current colleagues and managers to change their idea of what KPIs should be…
Thanks again.
This article really hit home for both me, and my husband. We’ve been journaling each morning for about two years, during which we set intentions for the day, note short and long term goals, and reflect on what we’re grateful for.
I think this will really change the way we think about our goals. We both tend to get frustrated when we don’t “hit” our goals, and I love your suggestion about approaching them intrinsically instead. Thanks for such a great read!
The examples at the end are very powerful.
“Pinto” in portuguese means “dick” (like the male organ) 😛
I wouldn’t wanna ride a Pinto. LOL
Fantastic article Paula! I’d just like to add one thing that might help in this area. I’ve been going through an awesome course by Eric Davis and Larry Yatch (a couple of Navy SEALs that really know their stuff) that teaches about perseverance and leadership (Sealed Mindset Leaders, check it out!). They define three different sets of things we strive for: Goals (otherwise known as Wants), Objectives (the “I shoulds” of life) and, Promises (the “holy crap I MUST do this” type stuff). It might help to frame your goal setting around these concepts. 🙂
I’ve been trying to set my goals this way for the past year or so and really like it. Such as my fitness goal is: lift 4x a week. And my FIRE goal currently is: save/invest as much as possible while still living a quality life (how I define that for myself). External factors play into when I can FIRE, and therefore I just control what I can and that is saving/investing. Same thing with working out. As long as I get to the gym 4x a week, I don’t really need to set a bunch of specific number goals in relation to say lifting numbers or my weight. That will take care of itself.
The problem with New Years resolution is that it’s then tied to the year itself. So, when you get off track, many people just figure they’ll try again next year instead of re-grouping and tackling the goal again. I honestly think more goals set on, say, August 1st, have a better chance of getting met, than those that are started on the first of the year.
Excellent point. I’d not thought of that before, but you are spot on.
I was nodding my head when you got to alternative 3. I try to set process goals instead of product goals, this past year my fitness goal was to train consistently and with high quality. This allowed me to appreciate my success even when I didn’t set any new personal bests, I still ran very well. As for my real estate investing, and blogging, I’m focused this year on being productive daily by committing to working on these endeavors daily with a focused effort, whether that is for 20 minutes or 2 hours – focused effort daily! Thanks for the encouragement.
Hi Paula,
It puts things in perspective for me to read that you struggle with procrastination.
“What? Paula is struggling too? How is that even possible, she is barely older than me and already achieved so much!”
So thank you for this 🙂
I have also been reading and thinking about habits instead of goals a lot lately. I’m actually preparing an article on this.. pressure!
What I wonder now, is that if we intend to make daily habits for our long term goals, we then need to edit our habits.
As you say, we can do anything but not everything. But when we set up goals we tend not to see how much work it will be because the deadline is far away. When we set up daily habits we become conscious of the limited number of things we can do, and that forces us to edit our lives and choose…
Hoping I make sense here, not sure actually 🙂
Anyway, thanks Paula, this was exactly what I needed to read. That explains a lot why procrastination happen on the most important things we have to do!
Claire
Claire –
Whoa, are you kidding?! I feel like my life is 80% procrastination / self-doubt / futzing / agonizing / distracting myself, and 20% actually getting sh*t done.
One thing I’ve learned, though, is that even high-performers are human beings, with doubts and insecurities and bad habits. The key is to wake up every morning and keep chipping away, making progress one step at a time. And to laugh at yourself, loudly, and often.
In real estate, for example, I’ve bought — on average — one property per year. That’s a slow pace which leaves me a lot of time for twiddling my thumbs and picking my nose.
In blogging, I’ve just plain stayed in the game for a long time. This website is almost 6 years old, which is a generation on the internet. I approach every article as though I’m creating a work of art, rather than just “generating content” — so even though I don’t publish often, the stuff I create is good enough that it gets noticed. And, well, that’s about it: quality, consistency, and just plain outlasting everyone else.
I make more mistakes than wins. The key is just that my wins are big enough to offset the rest of the noise. 🙂
Great article, Paula! I’m glad to hear someone else thinks this way. There is a lot of goal setting that goes on in my day job since I’m technically in sales (real estate). But I’m not really a fan of saying “My goal is to sell $XXX,XXX,XXX” because it is focusing way too much on the transaction and not the methods of getting there, IMO. Instead my goal(s) this year are to ramp up my networking efforts (attend at least one networking event a week since that is where the bulk of my business comes from, and they’re fun!), update my brand to reflect ME: logo, signs, business cards, and do a better job of following-up with clients that have either dropped off the radar or are waiting to buy.
Even though I don’t like using sales #s as goals, I have to have a number ready because that is what other agents ask me as soon as they meet me. It just seems so arbitrary to me. Again, the general thinking is to extrapolate your goals backward– so if your goal is $3 million, you divide that by the average price of a home in your area, then analyze your lead conversion % to see how many you need to convert to a sale, and then you know how many leads you need to follow up with. I know that is “normal” in sales but just not something I like to focus on. I’ve found that focusing on people and building relationships has been way more lucrative. When you just focus on closing a deal, it really rubs off.
Thanks again for another great post! It’s good to hear from you!
I read this post, I liked it and you write well!
You might find it interesting to read about well formed outcomes which is an NLP approach to goal setting.
The trick is to go from goals to themes. Or as you said, focus on actions not results. When you drop the attachment to the results it’s far easier to get into flow states and your work improves.
Love this! I’ve been trying to argue this point with my friends and colleagues for years. So it’s heartening to know that someone like yourself, who has been a firm believer in goal setting, can be persuaded to come over to the other side – even if it does require a reframe (actions not results) to get you here. Welcome!! 😊
I love this!!! I can relate to so much of this! Great read.
Great post, Paula! I think you hit the nail on the head with this one. I definitely enjoyed the 3rd alternative, which is how I try to tackle my goals. Instead of focusing on losing weight, I focus on not eating out as much, eating healthier, and utilizing portion control. And instead of focusing on paying down debt, I automate and “forget my debt”, and set my goal deadline to when it will organically be paid!
Glad to see you return to writing this month; I’ve definitely missed your posts! Not that I don’t love the podcast, but it lacks a certain je ne sais quoi that you can only get from your writing. If I were you, I’d never fear that your readers won’t like your posts. I haven’t found a single post of yours I’ve ever disliked or disagreed with, and I’m sure I’m not the only one!
Awww, thank you Rachel! I’m hoping to be more prolific on the blog, as well. I love writing. Sometimes I just tend to get in my own way. 🙂
The re-direction concept has been a game changer for me. Focusing on the individual action that you can control is extremely powerful, especially when things go wrong. Goals are important, but a goal without a system put into place is just a dream. Those controllable actions become the system to achieve the goal.
Scott Adams, creator of Dilbert put it this way:
“Goals are for losers, you need simple systems that improve your odds. Systems are for winners.”
Thanks for posting Paula. Your depth and research is always makes for a fantastic read.
Just finished Scott Adam’s book “How to Fail at Almost Everything and Still Win Big” and he makes a really compelling case against goals. How to create robust systems is a harder exercise than setting a goal. But it does sound more effective.
So so true! Thank you for this! This is one of those rare articles when “I felt the same way, but I didn’t know how to express it”.
I’ve been competitive dancer for many years and it was always interesting for me why some people work hard, take lots of lessons, practice hours and hours a day and get just moderate results, where others sometime in a very short period of time get tremendous results. And one thing I noticed is that more often dancers who don’t have a dance-related income progress much faster than those for whom dancing is a source of income.
And Problem #1: Goals harm intrinsic motivation explains it all. Dancers who expect to get potentially more money out of better results have this burden on them all the time and much more fear of failure. At the same time, people who dance for pure pleasure can develop and dance more freely and produce better results!
Eh, if only I knew it 10 years ago… But better now than never! 🙂
I’ve changed my approach to many things in the last two years, and approach to goals is one of them. Thinking that your life is what you are doing right now and getting the most out of it, focusing on what you CAN do rather than on what you cannot do is really powerful.
Thank you, Paula! Your blog and podcast are a real inspiration.
This was just what I needed to hear as i’ve been procrastinating on displaying my blog for months now! I love the actionable goal approach! I love to plan, but the execution has been terrible especially these last few years. Thanks for the great post!!!
Great post as always Paula!
“Procrastination is the soul rebelling against entrapment.” -Nassim Taleb
I thought of this quote immediately when reading this post.
That feeling when we really don’t want to do what we “supposedly” should be doing.
I think we should redefine or, your alternative #3, re-direct our goals. Your example was great. Instead of losing 10 pounds, focus on eating healthier and exercising. Hey I’d rather focus on what matters instead of the superficial.
I also hate setting calendrical goals but that’s how we structure business. So what do I do instead? Set goals that relate to the calendar for business. Everything else is more of a values or principles based goal.
Thanks Paula, for being awesome!
Matt Miller
I’ll admit that I wasn’t loving this post until I got to the end and saw the recommendation, focus on actions rather than results. I think that is a very effective way of reaching goals without having to focus strictly on the end goal. Come up with something you want to achieve, figure out what actions will get you there, and focus on those actions each day.
Great article. 🙂
A few years ago, I started creating New Years Theme’s vs Goals. That way I can measure every decision against the theme. This year my theme is “Honor thy Sacred Self”. At first glance, it may be difficult to see how financial decisions fit into that goal. However, it’s been coming together. If I want to buy that new dress because it’s on sale, I ask myself, does it “honor” me. It becomes really clear what you value and what you don’t. Same with investing. Planning for my future does fit into this theme. Just a different twist on goals/resolutions.
Talk about a coincidence. Last night a met some friends to catch up (in which, one was visiting us in Houston before moving to NY) and these same exact discussions about intrinsic/extrinsic motivations were a topic. I was simply blown away by reading your blog the following morning. The thing was, my friend who is moving to NY, everything she has done has been on an intrinsic scale of motivation (she’s worked her way into becoming an art director, but finds ways to teach kids in poor communities to play music, discover art, plant trees, etc to keep them from straying into a potential life of crime).
You are right: sometimes we become overly consumed with an end results goal instead of being motivated by enjoying doing said goal instead.
You and Gary Vaynerchuk (Gary Vee) are like my top two favorite type of entrepreneurs. You guys offer the added (and under-appreciated value) of emotional intelligence in the process. Thank you!
As a type-A person, I don’t think I can give up goals entirely. Instead, I’m focusing on building habits day-to-day that can result in a big goal eventually, but also bring me joy intrinsically. Great post, Paula!
Probably one of the better posts I’ve read on goal setting lately. And there’s been A LOT of them due to the time of the year. Well done!
Great post. It reminds me of a thought I try to share with some of my coworkers. It’s about enjoying the process of creating something, learning new things, and building towards results. If you love the process of whatever it is you’re doing, the rest will come almost automatically. If you don’t enjoy the process, you might succeed, but it’s going to be a real slog.
One word – AMEN.
Thank you! Thank you! I couldn’t understand why I couldn’t reach my goals in the past 10 years. Now I will focus on my actions and do things that I enjoy as those actions will lead to positive results.
Paula, this is the most encouraging article I’ve read in a very long time. At work, we are stuck with the SMART goal philosophy, and frankly, I’ve never worked under such a backward approach. We spend so much time focused on goals and goal achievement that there is precious little time or energy for innovation and new approaches to old ideas. I hope you don’t mind if I share this article with my coworkers to encourage them to truly think outside the “box”, to realize that yes, there is a better way to perform and it will achieve much more enjoyable results. I positively enjoy your writing style; so much free spirit but one can tell your are a seriously motivated and driven person.
Thank you George! Yes, please share it — and I hope that your colleagues are able to get some inspiration from this, to take action and improve your workflow and your innovative energy. 🙂
Fantastic post!!!
Yes! I’m trying to follow this when establishing work goals – I do a lot of policy work / business strategy / alignment-type work. Whether a project gets DONE completely is often out of my hands as I have to rely on the work and approval of others. I’m therefore trying to control only my own *deliverables* and not whether they are approved or whether others meet their commitments.
Great article.
Just to share that my approach is a hybrid one.
I use goals/task list periodically to give myself a check…approx 2-3 times/yr.
I agree, regularly looking at a monstrous list that never gets short… sux.
So really just ask yourself at the moment, what are the few things that I would like to do now.
Of those few things, what is simply the BEST thing to do at THIS moment.
So you never really tie yourself to any exhausting list on a daily basis, but you get to honestly say, yes, I’m spending my time the way I would like it to be…and yes, twice/yr my list will help me to redirect that is more important at another moment in time.
Your thoughts on why our “to-do” lists are so long and never ending?
Thks
I used to look at where I “should” be by now. What are people my age doing? How much should I be making? My mistake was setting goals based on these questions. Since then I have changed the way I think and am setting more day-by-day, in the moment type goals. Thanks for sharing – great post!
I’ve really been focused on my Circle of Concern versus my Circle of Influence a lot lately, given the state of politics and social media. It’s so powerful to keep reminding yourself that you can’t change a lot of stuff, but you CAN change some things. For someone who likes to stay in control, like me, I need that almost daily reminder! It’s also a really powerful way to change your mood–helplessness versus empowerment.
Many years ago, I changed my goal-setting style to the one you called “Re-direction.” We have no control over the outcome of certain things. Maybe that’s distressing to some people, but to me, it’s freeing. I love to focus on the things I DO have control over–getting up every morning and writing, saving a set amount of cash each month for our vacation, etc.
This article is definitely a winner! Thanks for making it a priority and writing it! 🙂
Yes! It’s like you read my mind at the beginning of the year! I realized that I was more self-motivated when I didn’t have set goals to achieve – like SMART goals. I actually found that goal setting had adverse results for me. I didn’t get anything done, I lost motivation, I set unrealistic expectations for myself and then called myself a big failure when I didn’t achieve them. Also, I found myself living way too much in the future than being fully present in the here and now. Now, I have begun letting the spirit move me and work on projects/ideas that are of greatest interest to me in the present. And I know I have gotten more accomplished and had more satisfaction in what I have accomplished than in my goal setting days. Thank you for the read – it was great to confirm what I had been feeling!
I’ve heard something similar on another blog. I’m still not sure if I’m totally convinced. Everything I wanted in life I had as a goal and envisioned over the last 10 years. But its a good theory to not have goals. Not sure if its best for everyone.
I am sorry, I would need to disagree with you with regards to goal setting. One could say that our character is defined by our habits. You change your habits, you change your character. You force yourself to do something that you don’t like for an extended period of time and it becomes a habit, then habit defines your character.
Time and time again, I have set goals on things that I hate to do. It is definitely a challenge. However, I have evolved into a better person forcing myself to do the things that I hate to do. It builds your inner strength. You often times end accomplishing more than what you set out to do and you also surprise yourself by actually doing it.
I have been setting goals consistently on an annual basis for several years now. Even if I achieve 50%, I am far better off than where I began.
Thank You Paula! I love your Newsletter – it is coming not too often but everytime it is something really interesting 🙂 Keep doing this best job!
Greetings,
Marta
Thanks for the eye-opener article. Setting goals is still necessary since it gives us a sense of direction. People need something to look forward to that’s why goals are usually made. However, we should set goals in accordance with our own personal likes or passion, and expect nothing in return. Good results will just fall into place. Using intrinsic motivation will increase the chances of achieving our goals.
Wow. Mind.officially.BLOWN. The paragraph on rewards actually UNDERMINING the goals was huge; the Rubin quote was the perfect eye-opener. “If I tell [my daughter] that she can watch an hour of TV if she reads for an hour, I don’t build her habit of reading; I teach her that watching TV is more fun than reading.”
I have changed how I set my goals over the last couple of years (using pretty much exactly the change you use as an example in weight loss vs. moving more and eating healthier!), but I’m still dangling rewards in front of myself that don’t reinforce what I’m doing. This is such a great article. Thank you for taking the time to research it and write it. The two months it took you was worth it!! 🙂
Could you be my mentor? I lost my mom in 2007 I have a very small family and walking life pretty much alone. To hear inspiring stories really helps. I own one house that is under renovation. Looking to own more. I’m just not all the way clear on a lot of things or what i am doing wrong. I work as well making 21 an hr full time. (The job is not a job I want for life either lol) I would like to one day live the life you are living. Any advice helps. I’m reading your blogs as well!
Interesting post Paula. I do think goal setting has a place in everyone’s schedule as it can give you a sense of direction and motivation but I do think some people place to much of an emphasis on it. Thanks for sharing!
Love this article!!! Just what I’ve needed to read.
I have overwhelmed myself with 2017 goals and honestly I’ve been paralyzed and haven’t done anything : (
Thank you for diving into this subject and offering a fabulous alternative.
I feel so much better about my goal setting after reading this post. I planned out my year and fill out my planner each week – but I still have a hard time meeting my goals. I’m not giving up on them, I just won’t be so hard on myself for now on.
Pantalone with another bomb blast!
I recently answered a question on Quora asking about the same. My answer was not as complete as yours – BTW kudos to you, great answer – but most points were aligned.
Great post keep up.
Ben
Such a unique perspective! I’m usually and avid goal-setter but it has taken me a few years to realize that perhaps I was creating unrealistic goals that always seemed to big to achieve. I like the concept of goal setting in moderation as sometimes you can feel a bit to stuck in your routine with setting goals and not actually living life in the present moment, or thinking outside the box.
I think no goal setting isn’t necessarily the way to go. We create goals because we are looking to achieve something, to work towards something that will make improve our lives. We find inspiration in writing them down and I think it’s important we hold ourselves accountable to give our goal the respect it deserves.
Amanda
Paula, are you not posting your income reports anymore? It’s been months since the last one. Just curious.
Great article however, I kind of disagree. I’ve always felt that everyone should have two types of goals. Immediate (and SMART – I hate this!) goals and then a higher, motivating vision. The vision doesn’t necessarily need to be SMART but simply needs to answer the overall question as to why you are doing something.
Interesting point of view!
I do believe that being goal oriented is key to achieving success, but the way to get there can be paved with stress and lack of enthusiasm as a consequence.
Breaking big goals into small, enjoyable habits to accomplish on a daily basis is indeed the smartest way to accomplish greater things 🙂
Hi Paula!
I’m new to your readership, and I’m HOOKED! Love your methods and ideas and this action-focused way of reframing how we think of goals is EXACTLY what gets results! Without the action, there is no movement forward! I’ve been procrastinating writing a press release because I’ve been so focused on results – and this article put it all into perspective for me. Now, I can just focus on writing my press release and ENJOYING the process 😀
Hi Paula – Just found your blog. Though this was posted in January, the timing is still awesome. Perhaps it’s because we’re approaching “International Happiness Day,” later this month, but I seem to be finding a lot of posts with similar themes. Goal setting is an interesting animal for sure. I find that it can helpful, but many times also make me feel hemmed in and myopic. I liked your thoughts on it. It’s important to find a balance. Thanks!
Words are incredibly powerful, more powerful than most people realize. For example, “should”. If you listen to your internal monologue, you’ll hear that work a lot – I should do this, or I should do that. Should is a horrible word that drives stress. It’s good to focus on actions – “I will exercise 3x a week” – but notice I didn’t say “I should exercise 3x a week.”
While I do focus more on actions and less on results, there are also times to focus on outcomes. I just try to make sure it’s a SMART goal that has a clear deadline, and isn’t a never-ending task.
The word “goal” like “happy” have meanings that have been twisted a little to make them stressful enough to make people run in the other direction or question whether they are having an authentic experience.
Thanks for the great rundown and reminder.
Great post! Thanks for taking the time and kicking your fear out of the way to get it done. Or was it that you embraced your fear?
Thanks again. Be well.
I can see you’ve already received plenty of encouragement, but why not add some more. You have a fantastic writing style and you DID create a “smart, funny article your audience will love”. Very refreshing and freeing, thanks for sharing it with us!
Hey, thanks for the article, it’s much needed. I see it like this, firstly, most of us suck. Then, we put in a lot of effort, goals, structure etc, and, become high achievers and performers. But people don’t tell you that being a high performer is a double-edged sword. Goal-setting and achieving is a really powerful animal, but it needs to be governed, and not in charge. Anyway, the comment is obviously colored with where I am at the moment. But please, don’t stop writing, I like your content! Best, B.
It’s fun and satisfying to set goals. To imagine the ‘new, happier you’ having achieved that big thing you imagined would make life better. It’s also easy to be seduced by the goal and never do the real work that gets you there. Just as you say, it’s taking action, small and seemingly insignificant steps that produce the real result. That’s the hard work. Concentrating and taking action on what you CAN do is life changing. This subject is more than an article, you could build a community around this idea.
I like it Paula. Your article really confirms what I’ve known for years. I used to run a management networking group. The speakers were all successful business women who invariably did talks advocating the need – actually must – to set goals in order to be successful. I never felt comfortable with that. I spent years as a results feeling I was a failure. I failed to even set goals in the first place. Despite spending hours sitting down trying to write the perfect SMART goals I never got anywhere and was fundamentally unhappy because i felt I failed…
Until I decided goals setting was not for me and that was quite ok. I moved away from theses management circles and started to do something I loved and believed in. I am a much happier person for it and I believe ‘richer’ for it.
But I have gone a bit too far the other way and I struggle to make ends meet sometimes. So your article has reminded me that I still need to have objectives to at least be comfortably off to do the things I want to do – eg go out with my friends, travel, get a HAIRCUT. ..!!!
So thank you Paula for procrastinating for two months. I for one appreciate your efforts! Muriel
I understand that writing the goal in this manner gives you a little bit of space to fail or rather to play around and see what happens for a bit. This is how I interpret it anyway. Not that this is a bad thing but for someone who really wants to get results, really wants that goal, isn’t the only way to really go full steam at it? Treading around a goal can take forever, whereas going at it with 100% determination can help you get it done, right? Just trying to get a different take here. I love the post but I don’t think it will work for everyone. Let me know if I am missing something here.
Goal limits you, when you live without a goal you can do better than when you set some goal. Settings goal and trying to fulfill is a conventional thing that may or may not be done, where as giving your best and forgetting about it gives you more happiness, when you succeed and no worry even you lost.
I never thought it this way, but I think you’re right, it’s the fear that leads to procrastination. Which leads to never getting anything done. Great post.
I agree with number 4. Goals have made me feel worse about my current situation at times. I got over this by trying to put my tasks to achieve my goal on auto pilot, and this really helped. My last major goal that made me feel this way was paying off our home mortgage. I’m proud to say we were able to pay it off in 19 months at $107,000. By focusing on the process versus the end I was able to get rid of the anxiety…a little bit lol
Are you practicing what you preach here by not writing any more blog posts? 😀
Love the podcast, btw. Been listening from the start. Keeps getting better. 🙂
I echo Rich. I need more Paula posts in my life!
Hi, thanks for this great read. I truly enjoy the openness and honesty of your words, it feels very friendly and straight forward. Not sure if its just me but it seems like your articles about goals are evolving and changing, containing more and more real life experience and external sources of information.
Cheers!
Hi Paula,
This article was really helpful. I just revised my current goals to be within my circle of control.
For example one of my goals is establishing an income as a freelance writer. A few days ago, in the spirit of “what gets measured, gets managed,” I decided to track my daily earnings.
Now that I’ve read this article, I’ll change my metric to the number of freelance jobs I have applied for. I suspect that my original goal would have been de-motivating, since my income will (probably) remain low for awhile, until I’ve built up repeat clients.
I actually do not have a specific goal here (such as ‘apply to 1 job per day’). Rather, I believe that the act of tracking will be enough to hold me accountable and keep myself making consistent progress (this is only a theory… I just started this method, so its effectiveness is TBD).
Priya
Ha I’ve read SO MUCH on goal setting and I STILL enjoyed this article, sheesh. The total bad ass on this topic is Danielle LaPorte that says fuck goals, just focus on how you want to feel. I LOVED this concept but I couldn’t get it to stick because I want money dammit!! This approach of focusing on actions may be a bit better for me. I can be a busy body and I’ve just accepted about myself that I LIKE to work hard to get shit done. Saving this article
Paula are you done with the blog? I really enjoyed your writing and I still enjoy your podcast (listen every week), but I was wondering if this is something you plan to come back to?
Hi Paula
You have made my goals even more easier to achieve now.
What I like the most is that low stress approach.
If I want to achieve something, I will make a goal of what I have to do to get closer to my goal.
That would work. Thanks
Wow Paula – you’re a great writer.
A natural? Or did you have to develop that talent over time.
My wife and I have noticed that once we set a goal and hold that vision in our minds it almost always comes true – what’s interesting though is it usually takes about 5 years before it does come to fruition.
Except quitting smoking – that took me about 20 tries and 15 years.
I have just discovered your blog and would like to say thank you for publishing great content.
Setting my goals for the entire year helped me to achieve a lot in my life.
I get what you’re saying here, but ….
The *problem* that I see in not having a goal, however fluid or non-binding it might be, is that one might not even realize if they are, perhaps, even regressing away from the aforementioned goal.
To take a simplistic example. Suppose, my goal is to reduce my weight by 10 lbs. Instead of weighing myself (daily/weekly/monthly) I just say that I will hit the gym every other day, eat healthy and see where I am in say, 6 months time. What if I’m picking up something – a snacking habit, not working out optimally, sleeping in, anything – that is being detrimental to my initial goal in the 6 months that I am oblivious to it taking root and then have no way to measure my progress, or lack of it?
In Operations there is something called DMAIC – Define, Measure, Analyze, Improve and Control. If you don’t Define, everything else falls apart.
Agree that short term and very specific goals might backfire but a bigger picture goal, I believe, is essential.
Wow this post really resonated with me. I litterly was just talking to a friend yesterday and said, “I think our problem is we have too many goals.” He joked that we should make a goal to not have too many goals.
I liked #4 too, that a goal indicates we are unhappy with the way things are. I see a lot of truth to this.
I do enjoy the satisfaction I get when accomplishing a goal. That, in turn, encourages me to set harder goals and achieve those.
I like point # 4 Goals make you dissatisfied with the present moment. I am ambitious, and I was beginning to file like my life was passing me by with milestones. Always the next thing. I still need goals for backward planning to actually accomplish some things, but I agree with you on the limitations of SMART goals – they really make you miss the big picture, what your life mission is all about.
As a teacher, we had a PD on smart goals – “By the end of the week 75% of students will be able to simplify polynomial expressions” – goals can be so specific, realistic, and measurable that they are stupid and unmotivating. How about a love of math? How is 75% an acceptable number to shoot for?
Goals are, what make living meaningful. To reach a goal means, that you can do what you have planned. And that is very important. But goal setting is a sensitive job, because goal must be within reach, not too high, nor too low.
The studies say, that if you have written goals, you will sooner or later reach them.j
“goals can narrow our focus” – well I started to think this one. Ain`t the goal`s idea to help you to stay focused, because the goal or goals and steps to your target.
I have read several research results that the goals are extremely useful. It is wise to realize that the goal-setting is an ongoing process. We have to adjust the goals based on our experiences. Setting goals cannot guarantee any results so we have to plan carefully, what kind of goals we will set.
I love goals. I love e to compete with myself. And when I screw up, I move on. Goals as a game is a fun way to live life. I appreciate this other viewpoint, though.
Good perspective here Paula. I have never really been a goal-setter myself. I see myself more of a goal-grabber. I know what I want as a basic level and I am always on the look out. If I see an opportunity to head further towards the high-level goal, I grab it.